Finding someone to listen to you again and again and again is a key element in getting through this difficult time. This can be a friend or a counsellor - it really doesn't matter. Talking about our feelings is key to coming to terms with our grief.

We have inherited the "stiff upper lip" of our parent's generation and have also been inundated with expressions such as "get on with life" and "closure" and "getting back to normal". None of these expressions or attitudes helps the grief stricken.

Losing a parent is a significant loss that is difficult to describe to someone who hasn't yet experienced it. The expectation of those around us to be "back to normal" takes an incredible amount of energy. The effort can be exhausting!!!

People don't want to see others in pain. But due to that, we try to rush people through a process that follows its own timeframes and requires time our culture finds difficult to give.

We will never be the same after this life experience but will eventually develop a new "normal" and learn to live in a world without our loved ones. This process fundamentally changes you and it requires time and patience from those that are close friends and relatives.

Hopefully the sheer numbers of Baby Boomers experiencing this life event will change how our culture handles grief. It is not well understood. Without that knowledge it becomes more difficult to navigate through this inevitable and disturbing life experience. Regrettably grief follows its own timeframes. You experience waves of grief even months later when you least expect it.

There are positive elements of the grief process. As you go through this process you can find your priorities are different than before and there is an appreciation of life that perhaps wasn't there in the past. Hopefully many Baby Boomers will experience some of these positive changes in their lives and help to change the way our culture handles grief.

Providing friends (and ourselves) with resources such as books to help them through this difficult time acknowledges the pain this experience brings.

Jane Galbraith
©2008

Jane Galbraith, BScN, R.N., is the author of "Baby Boomers Face Grief - Survival and Recovery". Her work in the community health field included dealing with palliative clients and their bereaved families and has also assisted facilitating grief support groups. She speaks to many organizations including the Bereavement Ontario Network annual meeting and the Canadian Palliative Care and Hospice Conference in the fall of 2007 and conducts workshops..

Her book is available through the author directly at jane.galbraith@sympatico.ca or www.traford.com/05-2319 or www.amazon.ca. More information about the book can be found at www.boomergrief.blogspot.com or www.trafford.com/05-2319. .

Please note; due to the sensitive nature of the articles the content has not been edited. This is to enable the Author to portray their true feeling surrounding the subject.